Nadia Essex dishes out her love advice on loving your best mate

Hi, darlings!

This week I want to talk about co-parenting after I saw Ryan Thomas have a pop at Tina O’Brien for letting their nine-year-old daughter Scarlett have her nails painted. I think it’s really important for people to abstain from venting on social media.

If Ryan had a problem with Tina, he should have picked up the phone and called her. I worry that their daughter could see the negative press one day and feel like a burden.

Nadia answers your relationship dilemmas:

Dear Nadia,

I’ve been dating a guy for a couple of weeks and things are going so well that we’re making plans for summer. I’m nervous because I’ve got commitment issues, how do I stay calm and not overthink it?

N: As soon as you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, stop the thoughts in their tracks and take a deep breath. There’s no need to feel scared of commitment – you’d go for a job interview without a second thought, so a relationship should feel no different.

Dear Nadia,

I think I’m in love with my best friend. We’ve known each other five years, but I always had a boyfriend until recently, and we kissed. He’s told me he’s bisexual and he’s on Grindr – could it ever work out?

N: There’s no reason why not. But you need to find out if his feelings are the same as yours, then go on at least five or six proper old-school dates to help you decide if there really is something there. It’s important you don’t have sex with him until after this point, otherwise you risk losing the friendship if it doesn’t work out.

Dear Nadia,

My boyfriend keeps trying to stick it in my bum during sex even though I’ve told him I don’t want him to do that. How do I get the message across that no means no?

N: You need to sit him down, away from the bedroom, in the cold light of day, when you’re both sober, and tell him you don’t like it. Explain that it’s negatively affecting your experience and hopefully then he’ll take you seriously.

If he keeps doing it, then it’s quite a serious issue that needs addressing if he doesn’t respect your boundaries.

Should you try out midnight oil?

Women need around 45 minutes of foreplay before they’re ready for the deed. If massage is your way in, use a water-based gel to keep it condom-friendly.

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