How to Talk About the Royal Wedding, Even If You Didn't Watch the Royal Wedding

If you’re a fan of sleeping, chances are you missed the royal wedding. Or maybe you were hungover, or maybe you just don’t care about the biggest wedding of the century—either way, no judgment here.

But just because you have healthy sleeping habits doesn’t mean you should miss out on all of the post-wedding gossip.

Not to fret, here’s a quick rundown of all the royal drama (well, lack thereof) from Saturday’s festivities so that you can participate in the water cooler chit chat that will inevitably dominate come Monday morning. None of your coworkers will be the wiser. 

What’s the part that everyone is talking about? 
Markle’s gown. Prince Harry’s tears. Amal Clooney’s yellow dress. The fact that Victoria Beckham didn’t smile.

Was there any drama? 
Not really, though Twitter was particularly hung up on The Most Reverend Michael Curry’s sermon, in which he brought up poverty, slavery and social media, quoted MLK and said “it’s fire” over and over again. Plenty of Twitter users attuned to the British monarchs’ reactions, especially given Prince Philip’s alleged racist past. 

There’s gotta be a meme, right?
C’mon, of course there is. Here’s our favorite: 

Did Meghan pay tribute to Diana? 
You betcha. Markle’s bouquet was filled with flowers that Prince Harry picked from Diana’s garden. Swoon.

Which famous Americans were there? 
George and Amal Clooney (who is actually Lebanese-British); Markle’s Suits co-stars; a Pretty Little Liars actress; Serena Williams. Oh, and Oprah!

Which famous non-Americans (that I know) were there? 
One fifth of the Spice Girls (and her hubby David), Idris Elba and of course, Elton John. The royal fam was there too (duh), including Queen Elizabeth II, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge—plus their cute brood—and the sisters with the hats. 

What did Markle wear? 
A custom, open-neck design with a mid-sleeve and flowing train by Clare Waight Keller for Givenchy. Her veil featured lace detailing and she topped off the look with Queen Mary’s Filigree Tiara, on loan from Queen Elizabeth II.


Wait, who was that designer?
Clare Waight Keller, the first female and first British artistic director of Givenchy. She previously helmed Chloé. It’s a big deal for Keller, whose historic appointment at the famed French fashion house was considered a win for women at a brand that had been previously dominated by men. Given Meghan’s political past, her decision to commission Keller was probably not a coincidence. 

So, did Markle’s dad go? 
Nope. After much back-and-forth following a heart attack and a paparazzi photo scandal of his own (the latter of which is the official marker of celebrity status), Thomas Markle did not attend the royal wedding. He is currently recovering from heart surgery that took place on Wednesday.

Wait, then who walked her down the aisle? 
Though Kensington Palace had initially stated that the father of the bride would walk Meghan down the aisle, that duty fell to Harry’s pop, Prince Charles. 

However, Meghan broke precedent when she decided to walk part way down the aisle on her own—Charles merely escorted her from the Quire to the altar. 

Go Meghan!
And that’s not all! Rather than being “given away” by Prince Charles, Meghan gave her own hand to Prince Harry. According to CNN, this had been her plan all along, even before her father revealed he was unable to attend. She also dropped the word “obey” from her wedding vows, because it’s 2018, people.

Did she buck any other royal traditions? 
Not Meghan in particular, however, there were quite a few unconventional aspects of the ceremony. In addition to the fiery address by Michael Curry, the bishop of the Episcopalian Church from Buffalo, there was also a rendition of Ben E. King’s “Stand By Me” sung by a gospel choir. The 1961 classic has political undertones, as it was something of an anthem during the Civil Rights movement. She was also slated to give a speech at her reception, which is an unusual move.

Did they eat cake? 
Boy did they. The royal wedding cake—a lemon and elderflower flavored confection—was baked by Claire Ptak of Violet Bakery, whom Meghan once interviewed for her now-shuttered lifestyle blog, The Tig. The couple broke hundreds of years of royal tradition by deciding to forgo a fruit cake, which is, for some reason, the typical flavor of choice. (We’d say this is the right call.)

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