My boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend but I've kept quiet

DEAR DEIDRE: MY boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I knew something wasn’t right and accused him of being with her. He swore nothing was going on and my friend lied about it too. But I caught them texting and had proof. 

My friend got drunk one night soon afterwards and texted me saying she was in love with my boyfriend.


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I am 26, he is 27 and we have been together for five years. We are trying to work things out but I struggle to trust him.

And how do I deal with my supposed friend? We went to school together but she hasn’t even said sorry. Would I feel happier if I had a go at her?

Am I just angry because I didn’t say much when I found out?

DEIDRE SAYS: She and your boyfriend have each betrayed you but you are focusing your anger on her when he is equally to blame. She might just be jealous of what you have but I doubt your friendship will recover.

Ranting at her will solve nothing, however. Focus on whether you and your boyfriend can work together to rebuild your relationship. My leaflet Cheating – Can You Get Over It? should help.

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