DEAR DEIDRE: I COULDN’T sleep a wink when my wife didn’t come home from her office party – as I am convinced she was having sex with somebody.
She has always been a high-flyer and got a job in a bank at the age of 18, climbing the ladder until she was earning way more than me.
For more advice from Dear Deidre
No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.
- Dear Deidre on Mental Health
- Dear Deidre on Identity
- Dear Deidre on Debt and Money
- Dear Deidre on Work
- Dear Deidre on Health and Wellbeing
- Dear Deidre on Addiction
We have been married for six years. I’m 35, she is 31 and we have a boy of two.
When our son was born, I stayed at home and she went to work because it made financial sense.
She put on weight during her pregnancy and then when lockdown happened, we both piled on the pounds.
My wife then secured a new job, running a department in a large bank.
She made new friends and loves working there. But I’ve noticed she has become more distant.
Also, she’s made the most of her gym membership, working hard on changing her body shape and drastically dieting and exercising.
On the other hand, I am the heaviest I have ever been, which is getting me down. But then I comfort eat and feel worse.
When the work party happened, she didn’t pick up her phone once. All I got was a text, insisting she’d had too much to drink and was going to collapse on a girlfriend’s sofa.
I don’t know if I believe her.
Get in touch with Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
Send an email to [email protected]
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
She admitted recently that our relationship needs some work and the reason why she doesn’t want to have sex is because of my weight.
Has our relationship run its course?
Most read in Dear Deidre
Jude asks his mum Ellen if he can stay with her after Mila kicked him out
I am in shock after fiance admitted to a gay affair and sons can't look at him
I'm getting fed-up of snide comments from my anti-vaxxer colleagues
My youngest daughter was upset she did not get a birthday gift from her aunt
DEIDRE SAYS: Do not let go so easily. You have both got different priorities – your wife with her career and you have your son, who needs you.
You may feel you can’t compete but are doing a great job too.
Both of you need to appreciate that your different roles can make a stronger team.
You have to keep talking to get over any bumps in the road.
You have no proof that your wife is cheating on you.
She is, however, distracted and has admitted your relationship needs work. These are both strong indicators that you need to invest in each other.
Find a time when your child is in bed to cook a nice meal for her and to talk about what you can do to improve what you have together.
If you want to do exercise to lose weight, feel more energised and confident, then gyms often have creches available.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
Mila walks in on Jude cheating after coming home early
I am in shock after fiance admitted to a gay affair and sons can’t look at him
Or, for outdoor exercise, check out buggyfit.co.uk.
My support packs, Relationship MOT and Reviving Your Sex Life, will help too.
Source: Read Full Article