Why Is Gwyneth Paltrow so Weird on Instagram?

Free-spirited It girl Gwyneth Paltrow has always conducted herself in a perfectly Goop-y and FOMO-inducing manner. An Oscar winner, businesswoman extraordinaire, and lifestyle guru — who also somehow manages to raise two kids and age in reverse — the 46-year-old is the epitome of what we want to be when we grow (er, glow) up.

Lately, however, Paltrow has surprised us in ways that don’t seem to conform to the persona we’ve come to know. The change began where all great things do, on Instagram. Explore G.P.’s unusual, three-pronged social media evolution below.

1) A Guise of Normalcy

At first glance, Paltrow’s feed is that of any other lifestyle and wellness-minded influencer and mom.

She does yoga on the beach!

Resolution motivation. Fresh #Gsport drop today on @goop (hi @harleypasternak)

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She hangs with fellow Oscar winners!

Today on the goop podcast… @juliaroberts PINCH ME I AM HER NUMBER ONE FANGIRL SINCE 1988 WHEN I SAW “SATISFACTION” (I still standby that movie).

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She eats awesome (and pretty) food!

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Have a safe, happy, delicious 4th!

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Have a safe, happy, delicious 4th!

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Have a safe, happy, delicious 4th!

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Charred sweet potato with homemade tortillas last night at @calasf ? Dinner was super special, really incred

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@chefico in SF. Extraordinary meal. @davidnayfeld ???

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@chefico in SF. Extraordinary meal. @davidnayfeld ???

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@chefico in SF. Extraordinary meal. @davidnayfeld ???

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It all goes down easy like a dairy-free vanilla milkshake, until you take a closer look …

2) ALL. THE. COMMENTS.

In a matter of months, Paltrow has become Hollywood’s meme queen — or, uh, meme response queen? If you have a meme of any kind or quality (spelling and grammar mistakes are no deterrent), there’s about a 70 percent chance Gwyneth will be adding her two cents in the comments section.

Topics she’ll address include (but are not limited to) butt play, BDSM, Brad Pitt’s hair, dancing to “Drunk in Love,” and the misrepresentation of her breasts.

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Drunk in Love, it’ll do that. #CommentsByCelebs

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Drunk in Love, it’ll do that. #CommentsByCelebs

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Drunk in Love, it’ll do that. #CommentsByCelebs

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Relatable. #CommentsByCelebs

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Relatable. #CommentsByCelebs

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Relatable. #CommentsByCelebs

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Newlywed life sounds lit. #CommentsByCelebs

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Newlywed life sounds lit. #CommentsByCelebs

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Newlywed life sounds lit. #CommentsByCelebs

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Absolutely not. #CommentsByCelebs

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Absolutely not. #CommentsByCelebs

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Absolutely not. #CommentsByCelebs

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mind = blown. #CommentsByCelebs

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mind = blown. #CommentsByCelebs

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mind = blown. #CommentsByCelebs

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You know what, maybe they are. #CommentsByCelebs

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You know what, maybe they are. #CommentsByCelebs

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You know what, maybe they are. #CommentsByCelebs

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A girl after our own heart. #CommentsByCelebs (cc: @bradfalchuk)

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RELATED: Kate Hudson Admits She “Stalked” Gwyneth Paltrow as a Teen

3) Odd Birthday Tributes to Her 14-Year-Old Daughter’s Friends

Recently, Paltrow has begun posting birthday tributes to daughter Apple’s friends.

Happy birthday to you, sweet Doobs. My other daughter, your giant heart lights up our lives.

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Is this Gwyneth’s way of doing her part for today’s youth — helping to make them Instagram famous? Does G.P. believe that children’s Instagrams are our future?

Just this week, Paltrow created another post for one of Apple’s friends. This time, she herself wasn’t included in the photo, and instead of tagging the intended teen, she “accidentally” (though we’ll never truly know) tagged an amazing account that consists of three dogs wearing wigs.

Exhibit A: 

Happy birthday @ava.crox ❤️we love and adore you. Thank you for being apples soul sister, the two of you together are just about my favorite thing ever.

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Exhibit B: 

This is the new DOGGY color for Winter-Spring 2019. Orange-Piggy ??!

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What can we make of all this? Are the decades of fame wearing down her social media façade? Is she creating a Wing-like space for 14-year-old girls/dogs wearing wigs to plot world domination? Is she too busy living her fabulous life to care? 

For now, we’re going with the latter.


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